Paramount Pictures and Hasbro, whose previous collaboration was the worldwide blockbuster ‘Transformers’ join forces with Spyglass Entertainment for another extraordinary action-adventure ‘G.I Joe’ – that’s what’s being marketed globally for this new flick. But don’t get your hopes up because if you’re expecting an actual plot and a clever/humorous dialogue banter between well developed characters. You’d have more luck watching half way through a Disney Pixar film.
The film was all action… and that’s it. Script, plot, the art of acting & characterisation was all completely fucked! Not that the screenwriters and director Stephen Sommers thought any of these film techniques would help make the movie a little more bearable. They seem determined to mainly deliver one high-octane, heavily CGI-laden ultimately deadening effect.
The film revolves around the idea of “the Joes” (not just the one all-American-hero G.I Joe) - now a massive underground secret service division with the best ops from all around the world cumulated into one unit…. Right… this is a seriously flawed foundation for the film to be base on since all I was asking throughout the film was, where’s the funding coming from? Didn’t anyone notice all their best soldiers disappearing? Why the hell are all these solders cocooperatively turning their back on their own countries to work for America? .... Weren’t any of these questions raised at all??? The government must all be fucken stupid in the near future. I mean… I’m all for good bullshit light entertaining actions films… but there’s only so much I can handle. And throwing in a whole heap of ‘the Mummy’ cast (Brendan Fraser, Arnold Vosloo & Kevin J. O’Connor) isn’t going to help the film whatsoever except maybe jack the budget up to make it seem like a bigger blockbuster film.
But hey! That’s just my opinion.
Don’t take my word for it; catch it in cinemas if you want to experience the mind numbing – eye rolling – ear and brain damaging film while it’s still available, because duds always get booted off the silver screens sooner than expected. Before i sign off i'd like to share my favourite line “You will now call me… COMMANDER! Muahhahaha!” – Hilarious... you’ll know what I mean when you see it. , ,